This ^^ is, for me, probably one of the hardest lessons to remember. I'm a worrier. I get it from my dad. The moment something starts to veer from the path I think it should take, I begin to envision the worst case scenario and dwell on it obsessively. I can't count how many times this has happened to me. Right now, the reason is that I am scrambling to sign up for my college courses on time because I am waiting for my clearances to be mailed to me. I keep thinking, "How am I going to get everything ready in time? What if I can't sign up for the classes I need and then have to take them at another campus? My boss is never going to be able to figure out my work schedule if I don't even know when my classes are!" And, cue *freaking out*. The thing I always fail to remember, or at least fail to consider, is that every other time I've let my irrational fears take over, everything has worked out okay, or even better than okay. I cannot remember one time when my expectations of such a situation have actually become reality. Things always work themselves out if I just give them time and keep calm. That simple fact should be enough to keep my fears at bay. Every time this happens, I give myself this very same pep talk. Maybe, someday, I'll listen and take my own advice.
I know it's not time for a snippets post yet, but I felt like posting some writing.
As time spun ever on, it seemed the days slipped, like grains of sand, too quickly through her fingers. The brevity of life pressed on her soul, causing her to frantically grasp at each moment in futile attempts to keep them a while longer. Thus she spent the last precious days: reaching for what could never be. Despite her efforts, minute slipped to hour and moment to memory. She realized, too late, the irony of her desperation: in trying to hang onto her life, she'd neglected live it.
This is something that's been on my mind a lot lately: too often I find myself too concerned with making the time stretch rather than making the most of the time that I have. This is a reminder to you - and to myself - to live life.
The sunshine-and-happiness scent of clothes dried on a clothesline.
A sun-dappled forest floor.
Watermelon seed spitting contests.
Iced coffee, a good book, and a blanket in the yard.
Summer is Simple. Unplanned. Extraordinary.
For those who have never read the Chronicles of Narnia, or specifically The Magicians Nephew, this is the wood between the worlds. In the books, it is a wood (obviously) with small pools, each leading to a different world. The wood is an intersection of all the worlds, but at the same time hardly a place in itself. It is transitory. A resting place. That's where I feel like I am right now: The "wood" between the worlds of childhood and adulthood. I'd hardly say that I'm an adult (I'm far too dependent for that), but nor am I a child anymore. I guess that's what the term "teenager" is for, but I don't feel that that's quite adequate either. At times I feel pulled to be part of one world or the other, but neither is quite right. I don't feel the same connection with my younger cousins, and I find adult conversation to be frightfully boring at times. (The economy? Politics? Blech.) In this place, I have so many responsibilities and expectations. Sometimes I'm treated like a child, and others I'm expected to act like an adult. At times it's frustrating.
I also recognize the importance of this time period. Who I am now will greatly influence who I will be as an adult. I know they say that who you are is almost completely developed by the age of 18 or 20. While I don't believe this completely, I know that many of my habits and morals right now will carry over into adulthood. At the age of 18, teenagers are expected to choose the career path that they will follow for the rest of their lives! If that's not daunting, I don't know what is. This "wood between the worlds" is at times exciting, frustrating and intimidating, but it's where I am right now and I aim to make the best of it.
I just wanted to thank everyone who commented on my last post. I honestly don't know why I was feeling so down-in-the-dumps but you were all so encouraging! I'm not going to delete this blog, I don't think that I could really go through with it. As for right now, I'm going to work on post ideas so we can get back to our regularly scheduled programming.
On another note, I'm not going to finish that photography challenge. I feel bad that I committed to something that I didn't finish, but I suddenly have a lot more on my plate than I bargained for, and what with college starting in less than a month, I have more important things to focus on.
Hey girls, can I ask you for some advice? I'm kind of starting to feel like no one is reading my blog anymore. I don't have many followers or much feedback. What am I doing wrong? What do I need to improve on? What kind of posts do you want to see more of? I'm feeling kind of discouraged right now, because this blog isn't nearly as fun for me anymore. I know that numbers don't matter, and I'm not saying that I think my blog should be immensely popular, I just wish I had more followers. Everyone else who started a blog around the same time as me seems to have a lot more followers. Any advice you can give me would be greatly, greatly appreciated. I have actually been seriously considering deleting this blog, because I don't feel like I'm getting anything out of it anymore. I enjoy blogging, but it's no fun when it's completely one-sided. I feel very selfish and whiny right now, but I just wanted to let you guys know how I'm feeling and that I would appreciate your help!
((or, the post in which I overwhelm you with photos and words))
The cabin is probably one of my favorite places in the world. Every year, we go for a week in the summer and a weekend in the fall. Every year, we do pretty much the same things, but I always enjoy it. I'm going to try to break up all the pictures with some words...
The Pennsylvania Grand Canyon: It's quite different from the actual Grand Canyon. For one thing, it's not nearly as deep, and for another, it's completely covered in trees. We go to the same overlook every year, and the view never ceases to amaze me.
As well as going to the overlook, we also hike on a trail that goes along the bottom of the canyon, called Darling Run:
So, today I was going to upload a ton of pictures and write a rambling post on my vacation last week. I'm not really feeling up to that, so I decided I would post another snippet instead. This first one was inspired last week. (I was with my mom's side of the family at a cabin, in case I never mentioned it.):
We walk on a road that looks as though it had sprung up with the trees and the grass around it. It is narrow and silent. Time stands still. No cars pass- we could be alone in the world. Yellow leaves litter our path. (But, it's summer, isn't it?) A stream appears and with it, a pull. Naturally, we stop. Skip a few stones. Wet our toes. All too soon, we turn. Make our way back to the world. Moments, we decide, are too fleeting when we could be alone in the world.
And a second one:
Love at first sight was not for her. Why, she wondered, would anyone want to be loved that way? It seemed, somehow, shallow. To latch onto the curve of a smile, the tilt of a nose, the curls of hair, and call such sudden infatuation love? Foolishness. Any boy who loved her would prefer a beautiful soul over a pretty face. She'd make him prove his love and earn hers. A more solid love is built slowly, and not all at once. Love at first sight was not for her. What do you think?
(2) Free from pretense, affectation or hypocrisy; sincere.
I know that this is not a new topic, and I
am far from the first blogger to attempt a post such as this one. I'm
not trying to write the definitive definition of the word "genuine" and
I'm only sharing my opinion, my personal take on the topic.
Genuine is one thing that I strive to be, above pretty much all else. Some of the people that get under my skin the most are the ones that feel the need to be fake. Everyone likes a genuine person; someone who is fully themselves and completely unabashed. A genuine person is one who has come completely to terms with who they are, someone who has accepted their flaws and learned to embrace them. No one said it would be easy, but all the hard work will be worth it in the end. Others tend to more readily accept those who accept themselves. Being genuine is the key to forming solid relationships of any kind. There's no feeling quite like knowing someone inside and out, from their deepest fears and insecurities to their headiest joys and most proud accomplishments. If you let someone in and they do the same for you, that knowledge can be the strong foundation of a lifelong friendship or marriage.So go, live, be genuine, be yourself. In the end, you will be glad you did. ♥♥Kristin
***An edit: I'm only going to be doing the "get-to-know-me" challenge for now and then maybe I will do the second challenge after that is completed. Also, I will not necessarily be doing them on consecutive days. There may be a few days in between each "day" of the challenge, if ya know what I mean. I guess I'm busier than I thought!***
Day 2: What I wore:
Please, excuse the messiness in the top picture. I need to get a full length mirror. Anyhoo, this is one of my favorite outfits!
T-shirt :: Walmart
Belt :: Target
Skirt :: I made it! (first and last sewing venture.)
Today's two challenges are (1) a self portrait with ten facts about yourself and (2) clouds.
A self portrait of sorts:
This one's just my feet. I was swinging, so the blurriness is explainable. Now, ten facts. This could be challenging:
1. Flip-flops are my favorite footwear (followed closely by moccasins. If I could wear flip-flops all summer and moccasins all winter I'd be in heaven.)
2. I'm told I eat surprisingly much for my size.
3. I hate cicadas. They're just creepy.
4. I hate the color purple.
5. I love roller coasters, but I'm not a fan of the ferris wheel. Go figure.
6. My favorite movie (at the moment) is Pride and Prejudice (2005 version I think) and I love period dramas in general.
7. I'm reading To Kill A Mockingbird for the first time. I know, shame shame, I can't believe I've never read it before! It's a staple at some point in most people's high school english careers. I'm not sure how I missed it. I'm looking for suggestions for some other good classics if you have any!
8. My summer to-do list is coming along nicely.
9. My handwriting changes according to my mood.
10.I find it difficult to come up with ten original facts about myself that you haven't heard before! (I may have even mentioned a few before.)
Part two, clouds:
Unfortunately, there weren't really any clouds to photograph today and I didn't want to put off starting the challenge another day just because of weather, so here is a picture of a "cloud" of fire. (and yes, it's corny. Just go with it.)
Quoted: "The quietest people have the loudest minds" - Stephen Hawking
Words are one of my favorite things, as you all have easily discovered if you've read even one of my posts. I firmly believe in the power they can hold in both written and spoken form as well as set to music. Still, there are times that I believe words can be a hindrance rather than a help. How can you possibly describe using mere words the depth of love that your grandfather has for your grandmother, a mother has for her newborn child, or that a groom has for his new bride? How can words even begin to describe the heartwrenching pain of losing a close family member, the despair of losing everything that one has worked so hard to accomplish or the intensity of fear in the heart of a child watching his world crumble around him? Sometimes I feel that words undermine emotion, with futile attempts to wrap it up in a consumable package when it was never meant to be so easily brushed aside in the first place. Words can create emotion, but emotion can never quite become something so constricting as words. Words have their place, but there is also much to be said about silence.
I found a 15 day photography challenge that I'd love to try. I guess it's not so much about my skill as a photographer but more like a get-to-know-me type of thing:
For internet safety/ permission reasons, I will modify numbers 7, 10, 11 and 15.
Because I also want to practice my photography, I am going to do this challenge simultaneously:
I will only do 15 days so that it matches up with the first challenge. The days I will complete are 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 10, 12, 14, 17, 18, 20, 23, 26, 28 and 29. I hope that I can keep up! I'm really looking forward to doing this. If you'd like to join me, that would be fun! I will begin tomorrow.
**First of all, I would just like to apologize for my absence from this blog. I've been busy as well as having a bit of writer's block. This is somewhat of an experiment with a new monthly thing. At the beginning of the month, I want to write what I look forward to for that month (big things and little ones.)
- Hiking with my cousins
- Going to the cabin with my family
- Eating ice cream from the Ice Shack with my bestfriend
- Catching lightning bugs
- Soaking up summer♥